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英語閱讀笑話短文

發布時間: 2023-09-02 03:36:04

『壹』 好笑的英語笑話小短文

民間笑話的根本功能在於引人發笑,在這個使人緊張而倍感壓抑的商品經濟時代,笑話成了撫慰人焦灼靈魂的一劑良葯。下面是我帶來的好笑的 英語笑話 小短文,歡迎閱讀!

好笑的英語笑話小短文篇一
Fame and hardwork

名聲與艱苦勞動

During the Gulf War,my sister,Jane,bought a flag and asked her apartment's maintenance man, a Vietnam vet,to install a pole for him. When she offered to pay him,he told her there was no way he could take money for putting up the American flag.

海灣戰爭期間,我妹妹珍妮買了一面美國國旗,她請房子的維修工—一位老兵給她豎一根旗桿。當我妹妹為此什給他錢時,他說,他幫助掛美國國旗,無論如何都不該收錢。

Jane contacted her local newspaper,and they published an article about the incident. The next time she encountered the maintenance man, he told her that everyone he knew had read her story and that she had made him a celebrity.Jane jokingly asked for his autograph.

珍妮來到當地報杜,就此事在報上發表了一篇 文章 。當珍妮第二次碰到那位維修工時,他對珍妮說他所認識的人都看了她寫的報章,是她使他成為了名人。珍妮開玩笑地說讓他給簽個名。

"I don't have time,"the man replied. "I'm too busy setting up American flags.」

他回答說:「那我可沒時間,掛美國國旗的事忙得我不可開交。」
好笑的英語笑話小短文篇二
Home alone

獨自在家

My wife will go to any extreme to keep people from,knowing she is home alone. One evening when I was working late,my wife heard a knock on the door. She ignosed it,but the knocing continued. Frantic,sloe began to bark,softly at first,then louder and louder. Much to her relief,the knocking soon stopped.

我妻子獨自在家時,總是不想讓別人知道家裡沒有其他的人。一天晚上,我工作到很晚。我妻子聽到有人敲門,她就沒理,但敲門的聲音總是不停,慌亂之中,她開始學狗叫。一開始她低聲地叫,隨後她的叫聲越來越大。敲門聲很快地停了,她這才鬆了口氣。

The next day the paper boy came to the door to collect."I came by last night,"he told me,"but I left when your wife barked at me!"

第二天,送報的小孩來我家收錢,那小孩告訴我:「我昨晚上就來了,你老婆老沖我學狗叫,我就走了。」
好笑的英語笑話小短文篇三
Peter decides the grade

彼得的長相決定了分數

One semester when my brother, Peter,attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis,an art-student friend of his asked if he could paint Peter's portait for a class.assignment. Peter agreed,and the art student painted and submitted the portrait, only to receive a C minus.

我兄弟彼得在明尼阿波利斯的明尼索達大學上學時,有一個學期,他的一位學藝術的朋友問他是否可以用他做 素描 的模特作為課堂作業。彼得同意了。那位藝術生畫完了,就把肖像交給了老師。他只得了一個C-.

The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade was so poor. The teacher told him that the proportions in the painting were incorrect.」The head is too big,」the professor explained.」The shoulders are too wide, and the feet are enormous."

那位藝術生找到教授問為什麼他的分數這么低。教授告訴他肖像中的比例失調,教授說:「腦袋太大,肩太寬,腳也過於大了。」

The next day,the art student brought Peter to see the professor. He took one Look at my brother."Okay, A minus. "he said.

第二天,那位藝術生帶彼得見教授,教授看了我兄弟一眼,並說:「好,可以得A-。」
好笑的英語笑話小短文篇四
Being considerate

善解人意

I had iust learned to drive and, like most teen-agers,begged at every opportunity to take over the wheel. During a family vacation my father finally allowed me drive on a long,straight stretch on highway.I was in my glory until there was a sudden turn in the road.Caught unaware, I swung too wide and ran into a service station's advertising sign. I stopped the cat and waited for a lecture.

像大多數的青少年一樣,我剛學會開車時,總想利用一切開車的機會。有一次家庭外出度假時,我經過請求,爸爸終於允許我在筆直的高速公路止駕駛。我感到十分榮幸,直到開到了一個急轉彎,由於轉盤轉動得太大,車直奔著加油站的 廣告 牌沖去。我停下了車,等著挨訓。

My father,always considerate of his children's feelings,turned back to the rest of family and said. "As long as we're here,does anyone need to use the rest room?"

我的父親總是考慮到孩子喲情緒,轉過身對家裡的其他人說:「既然我們已經把車開到了這兒,有人想上廁所嗎?」


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『貳』 英語笑話故事_有趣的英語小笑話故事閱讀

笑話,顧名思義,是一種通過幽默的文字或圖示來達到令人會心一笑或捧腹大笑效果胡喚的文學形式。我整理了有趣的英語小笑話故事,歡迎閱讀!

有趣的英語小笑話故事篇一碰派
Life is cruel to men. When they are born, their mothers get the compliments and flowers. Whenthey are married, their brides get the presents and publicity. And when they die, their wivesget the insurance.

生命對於男人來說是褲吵凱殘酷的。當他們出生的時候,他們的母親得到恭維及鮮花。當他們結婚時,他們的新娘得到禮物並出盡風頭。而當他們死時,他們的妻子得到保險金。
有趣的英語小笑話故事篇二
Wife: Bill, the man in that house opposite always kisses his wife when he leaves in the morningand he kisses her again when he comes back in the evening. Why don't you do that too?

妻子:比爾,住在對面那所房子的那個男人早上出門前總要吻一下妻子,晚上回來時再吻一下,你為什麼不那樣做呢?

Husband: Well, I don't know her very well yet.

丈夫:哦,我跟她還不是很熟。
有趣的英語小笑話故事篇三
Mr. Brown came to an inn on a very cold day, and could get no room near the fire.

在一個寒冷的冬日, 布朗先生來到一家小客棧,發現火爐旁邊已經沒有空位了。

He called to the hostler to fetch a peck of oysters, and give them to his horse.

於是,他讓旅店的馬夫去拿些牡蠣來喂他的馬。

"Will your horse eat oysters?" said the hostler.

“您的馬吃牡蠣嗎?”馬夫問道。

"Try him, " said Mr. Brown.

“你試著喂喂吧。”布朗先生回答。

Immediately the people ran to see this wonder, and Mr. Brown who alone remained in the room,chose the best seat by the fire and made himself comfortable.

頃刻間,人們都跑去看這一奇觀,而布朗先生卻獨自呆在屋裡,他在火爐旁找了個最好的座位,舒舒服服地坐在那取暖了。
有趣的英語小笑話故事篇四
A husband and wife, both 91, stood before a judge, asking for a divorce. "I don't understand,"He said, "Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"

有一個丈夫和妻子都是91歲,他們站在法官面前,要求離婚。“我不明白,”法官說,“你們為什麼到了這把年紀還要離婚?”

The husband explained, "Well, you see, we wanted to wait until the children died."

丈夫解釋道:“嗯,你是知道的,我們想要等到孩子們都死了。”

『叄』 經典幽默英語笑話8篇

下面是我整理的經典幽默 英語笑話 ,歡迎大家閱讀!

經典幽默英語笑話:The New Baby

Mr.and Mrs.Taylor had a seven year old boy named Pat.Now Mrs.Taylor was expecting another child.

Pat had seen babies in other people's houses and had not liked them very much,so he was not delighted about the news that there was soon going to be one in his house too.

One evening Mr.and Mrs.Taylor were making plans for the baby's arrival.This house won't be big enough for us all when the baby comes,said Mr.Taylor.

Pat came into the room just then and said,What are you talking about?We were saying that we'll have to move to an other house now,because the new baby's coming,his mother answered.

It's no use,said Pat hopelessly. He'll follow us there.

新生兒

泰勒夫婦有一個七歲的男孩,名叫帕特。現在泰勒太太正懷著第二胎。

帕特在別人家看見過嬰兒,他不太喜歡他們,所以他對自己家裡也將有一個嬰兒的消息感到不滿。

一天晚上,泰勒夫婦正在為這個嬰兒的降生計劃做安排。泰勒先生說:有了嬰兒,我們的房子就太小,不夠住了。

帕特恰好在這個時候走進屋,他問:你們在說什麼?他的母親回答說:我們在說我們現在得搬家,因為嬰兒就要誕生了。

那沒用,帕特絕望地說。他會跟我們到那兒去的。

經典幽默英語笑話:What Are The Two Words?

A very nice old lady had a few words to say to her granddaughter.My dear, said the old lady,I wish you would do something for me.I wish you would promise me never to use two words.One is‘lousy’and the other is‘swell’.Would you promise me that?

Why,sure,Granny,said the girl.What are the two words?

是哪兩個詞?

一個非常高貴的老夫人有幾句話要對她的孫女說。我親愛的,老夫人說:我希望你能幫我一個忙。我要你答應永遠不要用兩個詞。一個是‘討厭的’,另一個是‘極好的’。你能答應我嗎?

噢,當然,奶奶。女孩說:是哪兩個詞?

經典幽默英語笑話:What's your name?

A very strict officer was talking to some new soldiers whom he had to train.He had never seen them before,so he began:My name is Stone,and I'm even harder than stone,so do what I tell you or there'll be trouble.Don't try any tricks with me ,and then we'll get on well together

Then he went to each soldier one after another and asked him his name.Speak loudly so that everyone can hear you clearly,He said,and don't forget to call me 'sir'.

Each soldier told him his name,unitl he came to the last one.This man remained silent,and so Captain Stone shouted at him,When I ask you a question,answer it!I'll ask you again:What's you name,soldier?

The soldier was very unhappy,but at last he replied.My name is Stonebreaker,sirhe said nervously.

你叫什麼名字?

有一位很嚴厲的軍官在對一群交由他訓練的新兵訓話。他以前從沒見過這群新兵,於是他開始 自我介紹 :我的名字叫Stone(石頭),事實上,我甚至比石頭更強硬。這就是我為什麼要告訴你們我名字的原因。不要試圖對我玩什麼花招,這樣我們就能很好相處了。

接著他開始走到每個士兵前面問他們的名字。說大聲點,讓每個人都能聽清楚。另外,不要忘記稱呼我為長官。他說。

每個士兵都對他說了自已的名字。他走到最後一位士兵面前時,這個士兵保持著沉默。於是Stone隊長對他喊叫,當我問你問題的時候,要回答!我再問一遍,你的名字,士兵?

那個新兵很不高興,但最後他回答了。我的名字是Stonebreaker(碎石機),長官。他緊張的說。

經典幽默英語笑話:No Problem

A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop. How can I help you? asked the stylist. I went for a hair transplant, the guy explained, but I couldn't stand the pain. If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you $5,000.

No problem, said the stylist, and he quickly shaved his head.

沒問題

一個禿頭的男人坐在理發店裡。發型師問:有什麼可以幫你嗎?那個人解釋說:我本來去做頭發移植,但實在太痛了。如果你能夠讓我的頭發看起來像你的一樣,而且沒有任何痛苦,我將付給你5000美元。

沒問題,發型師說,然後他很快幫自己剃了個光頭。

經典幽默英語笑話:

The great painter was asked, one day to paint a picture of Pharaoh crossing the Red Sea. A little while after the picture had been commenced,a hitch arose over the fee,and Hogarth found that he would have to complete the commission for about half the sum he expected. When the work was com pleted, the patron was asked to come and inspect it.As a matter of fact,the picture was just one daub of brilliant red.

What's this? exclaimed the purchaser.I asked for theRed Sea, on the occasion of the celebrated passage.

That's it,replied Hogarth.

But,where are the Israelites?

They are all gone over.

Where are the Egyptians?

They're all drowned.

一天,有人請這位偉大的畫家畫一幅法老王渡紅海圖。這幅畫剛開始不久,酬金就出現了問題。霍迪斯發現,完成這幅畫後,他只能得到他想要的大約一半的錢。當作品完成之後,那位主顧被請來看畫。其實,這幅畫不過是胡亂塗抹的一片鮮紅。

這是什麼?那位買主喊了起來。我要的是紅海,是那次著名的航海。

這就是,霍迦斯回答說。

可是以色列人在哪兒?

他們都已經渡過去了。

埃及人在哪兒?

他們全都淹死了。

經典幽默英語笑話:人們什麼時候說話最少?

Teacher: What is the plural of man,Tom?

老師: 湯姆,“男人”這個詞的復數形式是什麼?

Tom: Men.

湯姆:男人們。

Teacher: Good. And the plural of child?

老師: 答得好。那“孩子”的復數形式呢?

Tom : Twins.

湯姆: 雙胞胎。

經典幽默英語笑話:我丈夫剛進來

The couple seated in restaurant seemed to be having a wonderful time. But as the woman glanced away from the table,their waiter suddenly rushed over.

在飯館里坐著一對夫婦,他們看上去非常高興。但是當那女子向旁邊瞥了一眼時,服務員馬上跑了過來。

“Madam look,”he said.“Your husband just slid under the table.”

“夫人,您瞧,” 他說,“您丈夫滑到桌子底下去了。”

“No,he didn't,”she replied.“My husband just came in the door.”

“不,他沒有,” 她回答,“我丈夫剛從門外進來。”

經典幽默英語笑話:有兩條褲子

A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”

丈夫下班回到家裡,發現自己的新娘心緒煩亂。“我心裡太難受了,”她說。“我在給你熨西裝時把褲子的臀部燒了個大洞。”

“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”

“沒事兒,”丈夫安慰她說。“你忘了我這套衣服有兩條褲子。”

“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”

“是的,”妻子高興地說,“幸虧你還有一條,我後來就用它來補了這個洞了。”

『肆』 英語笑話故事

精品英語笑話故事仿檔念(精選6篇)

口香糖有助於他們防止耳鳴。飛機著陸後,困惑怎麼才能把口香糖從耳朵裡面取出來呢?以下是我為你帶來精品英語笑話故事,歡迎閱讀。

英語笑話故事 篇1

It had been many years since my last eye exam,and my wife was pestering me to make an appointment. The more she nagged , the more I procrastinated. Finally,she made an appointment for me.

我己經很多年沒做眼睛檢查了。我妻子總是催我去掛個號。她越是督我,我越是耽擱不去。最後,她替我掛了個號。

The day before I was to see the doctor,I was in an affectionate mood. After kissing and hugging her, I told her she really looked. good to me.,

在我去見醫生的前一天,我的情緒特別好。我對妻於又是親又是抱,還說她是我眼裡最漂亮的女人.

"That does it,」she said.「I'm canceling your appointment."

她說:「這回眼睛沒問題了,那我現在就去把號退了。」

英語笑話故事 篇2

Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents' house. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers, when the younger one began praying at the top of his lungs: "I pray for a bicycle. I pray for a new toy."

兩個小男孩在祖父母家過夜。睡覺的時候,兩個小男孩跪在床邊開始祈禱,這時小一些的孩子扯開嗓子大聲喊道:「我祈求得到一輛自行車。我祈求有一個新玩具。」

His older brother leaned over, nudged him and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf."

他的哥哥靠過來,用肘輕碰他說:「你為什麼這么大聲喊叫呢?上帝又不是聾子。」

To which the little brother replied, "No, but Grandma is!"

弟弟回答說:「是的,但是奶奶聽不到呀!」

英語笑話故事 篇3

A tourist passing through South Dakota stopped at a blood bank to make a donation. Afterward,he was resting on a cot and saw another donor, who appeared to be a Native American.

有個旅行者在穿越南達科這州時,在一家膚血站獻了血.獻血後他坐在一張小床上休息。這時,他見到另一個人前來獻血.那個人看起來好像是美國的本土人。這個旅行家於是就和他攀談起來。「你是不是住在路那邊的蘇族印地安人保護區?」

The tourist struck up a conversation and asked,」Do you live on the Sioux reservation up the road?"

「沒錯兒。」那人回答.

"Yes,"the man replied.

備困「你是百分之百血統的蘇族印地安人嗎?」

蠢鍵"Are you a full-blooded Sioux?"

「噢,不能完全這么說?. "那人說:「我現在就缺少了一品脫的血.」

"Well,actually,no,"said the man. "Right now I'm a pint low. "

英語笑話故事 篇4

After my husband,John,and I moved to Michigan from Nebraska,our new friends,proud of their beautiful tree一lined roads,teased us about the Mid-west's ll,flat,treeless land. When my parents,Nebraska farmers,visited us,I asked them about their trip.

我和丈夫約翰從內布拉斯加搬到密西根後,我們新認識的朋友們總為他們美麗的`林蔭大過引以為榮.他們嘲諷我們的中西部平原荒涼、貧瘩,連株枯樹都沒有。後來我父母從內布拉斯加的老家來看我們,我問他們對旅途的感受。

What a boring drive,"my father replied."Once you get to Michigan, there's nothing to see but trees."

我父親抱怨著:「枯澡,乏味,一進入密西根,除了樹什麼都沒有。」

英語笑話故事 篇5

The little girl was sitting in her grandfather's lap as he read her a story. From time to time, she would take her eyes』 off the book and reach up to touch his wrinkled cheek. By and by she was alternately stroking her own cheek, then his again.

小女孩坐在祖父的膝上讀故事。她時不時的從書上轉移視線抬起頭來碰到他褶皺的臉。隨後她摸摸自己的臉頰又回去摸摸祖父的。

Finally she spoke, "Granddaddy, did God make you?"

最後她問:「爺爺,是上帝創造的你嗎?」

"Yes, sweetheart" he answered, "God made me a long time ago."

「是啊,甜心。」他回答道:「上帝很久前創造出了我。」

"Oh" she said, then "Granddaddy, did God make me too?"

「喔。」她回答。接著又問道:「爺爺,上帝也創造了我嗎?」

"Yes, indeed honey" he assured her. "God made you just a little while ago."

「是啊,當然了寶貝。」他向她保證:「上帝只是不久前創造的你。」

"Oh" she said. Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, "God's getting better at it now isn't he?"

「喔。」她回答。又分別感受了兩人的臉頰,邊觀察邊說:「上帝的技術越來越好了,是不?」

英語笑話故事 篇6

Little Johnny says "Mom, when I was on the bus with Daddy this morning,

小強尼說:「媽媽,今天早上和爸爸在公車上時,

he told me to give up my seat to a lady."

他叫我讓座給一位女士。」

"You've done the right thing," says Mommy.

媽媽說:「你做得很對呀。」

"But Mommy, I was sitting on daddy's lap."

「但是,媽媽,我是坐在爸爸膝蓋上的。」

;

『伍』 關於搞笑的英語短文閱讀

隨著全球化經濟步伐的加快和跨文化交流的頻繁,專業英語能力成為了高等專門人才的必備能力素質。本文是關於搞笑的英語短文,希望對大家有幫助!

關於搞笑的英語短文:誰最懶 Who Is the Laziest

Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?

Tom: I don't know, father.

Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?

Tom: Our teacher, father.

中文:

父親:哎,湯姆,今天我跟你們老師談頃敬雀過,現在我想問你個問題。你們班上誰最懶?

湯姆:我不知道,爸爸。

父親:啊,不對,你知道!想想看,當別的孩子們都在做作業、寫字時,誰在課堂上坐著,只是看人家做功課?

湯姆:我們老師,爸爸。

關於搞笑的英語短文:Things Have Been Okay.

A young couple was becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him.

Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, "Mom, the toast is burned."

"You talked! You talked!" shouted his mother. "I'm so happy! But why has it taken this long."

"Well, up till now," said the boy, "things have been okay."

中文:

一對年輕的夫婦對於他們四歲的兒子仍然不會說話這件事非常著急。他們帶他去看專家,但是醫生們找不出任何不正常的地方。

之後有一天早上,這個男孩突然說道:“媽媽,麵包拷糊了。”

“你說話了!你說話了!”他的媽媽嚷道。“我真高興!但是為什麼要我們等這么長的時間呢?”

“嗯,直到現在,”男孩說,“每件事都很正常啊。”

關於搞笑的英語短文:欺騙的代價 The Revenge

Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he said to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones."

Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you."

Johnson: "But I want you to."

雀早Wife: "But why?"

Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"稿配

譯文:

老農約翰遜就要死了。他的家人都站在床邊。他聲音低沉地對妻子說:“我死後,我想你嫁給農夫瓊斯。”

妻子說:“不,在你死後,我不能嫁給任何人。”

約翰遜:“但我希望你這么做。”

妻子:“為什麼?”

約翰遜:“因為瓊斯曾在一筆販馬的交易中欺騙了我。”

『陸』 經典英語笑話6篇

英語笑話是指以一句英文短語或一個英文故事讓說話者和聽者之間覺得好笑,或是產生幽默感,笑話是一隱肢物種經過藝術加工的語言形式,是藝術化的語言,笑話是一種藝術方法。下面是我整理的英語爆笑笑話,歡迎大家閱讀!

英語笑話一:

我要做的一切就是付錢!All I do is pay

"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "My

wife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,

and my daughter is foreign secretary."

"Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is your

position?"

"I’m the people. All I do is pay."

布朗先生告訴同事說:“我的家簡直就象一個國家一樣。我妻子

是灶液財政部長。我岳母是作戰部長,我女兒是外交秘書。”

“聽上去挺有意思的,”他的同事說,“那你的職務是什麼呢?”

“我就是老百姓。我要做的一切就是付錢。”

英語笑話二:

喂狗 For the Dog

The family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter.

"My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?"

"Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"

一家人在飯館里吃過晚飯,父親把服務生叫了過來。

”先生,什麼事?“服務生問。

”我兒子的盤子里剩下許多肉,“父親說,”能給我們一個袋子嗎?我把剩下的東西帶回去喂狗。“

”啊呀,爸爸!“兒子激動地叫喊著。”咱家養狗了嗎?“

英語笑話三:

腦移植 A Brain Transplant

The Brain Surgeon was about to perform a brain transplant.

"You have your choice of two brains," he told the patient, "For $1000 you can have the brain of a psychologist, or for $10,000 you can have the brain of a politician."

The patient was amazed at the huge difference in price. "Is the brain of a politician that much better?" he asked.

The Brain Surgeon replied, "No, it’s not better, just unused."

一個外科醫生正要作一個腦移植手術。

“你可以從兩個腦子中選一個給你。”醫生告訴病人,“一個心理學家的大腦1000美元,一個政飢喚治家的大腦10000美元。

病人很驚訝二者之間這樣大的差別,“政治家的大腦好一些嗎?”他問。

醫生說:“不是好一些,只是沒有用過。”

英語笑話四:

不是我的錯

It's not my fault

Mother (reprimanding訓斥,譴責 her small daughter): You mustn't pull the cat's tail.

Daughter: I'm only holding it, Mom. The cat's doing the pulling.

不是我的錯

媽媽(正教訓她的女兒):你不該拽貓的尾巴。

女兒:媽,我只是握著貓尾巴,它自己在拽。

英語笑話五:

Coins in American Currency 美國的硬幣

There are 100 cents in a dollar. Coins come in the following denominations: $.01 or 1 cent (a penny,a cent, one cent), $.05 or 5 cents (a nickel, five cents),$.1 or 10 cents (a dime, ten cents), $.25 or 25 cents(a quarter, two bits, twenty-five cents), and $.50 or50 cents (a fifty-cent piece).

Coins are called "change", "small change", or"silver" though they aren’t made of silver anymore.

Coins are generally recognized by their size, butsomebody "goofed" on the dime, which is smaller than either a nickel or a penny. All the others are in size order.

One more word for you: don’t hold out your hand with either bills or coins and expect someone to take the correct change from you. That cannot be done in any Western country.一美元中有一百美分。硬幣是按下列幣值鑄造的:一美分,五美分,十美分,二十五美分,五十美分。

硬幣也叫"零錢","小錢",或"銀幣",雖然它們不再是用銀子鑄成的。總的說來,硬幣是通過大小來識別的,但總有人把十美分搞錯,它比五美分和一美分都要小。其他的都按幣值的大小順序排列。

還有一點要說明:你不能伸出手,托出一把紙幣和硬幣而希望別人從你那裡拿走數目正確的零錢。這在任何西方國家都是不好的。

英語笑話六:

Now We Run 現在我們跑吧

A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach. After watching the boy’s efforts for some time, the priest moves closer to the boy’s position. He steps smartly across the street, walks up behind the little fellow, places his hand kindly on the child’s shoulder and gives the doorbell a sold ring. Crouching down to the child’s level, the priest smiles and asks, "And now what, my little man?" The boy replies, "Now we run!"

一個牧師正沿著街走路,這時他看到街對面有個小男孩正試圖按一所房子的門鈴。但這個小孩太小了,門鈴又高,他夠不著。看到那個小男孩費了很多勁,牧師走近了他。牧師優雅地穿過馬路,走到小傢伙的背後,輕輕地把手放在小男孩肩頭,按響了門鈴。他彎下身子,微笑著問道:“接下來怎麼辦,孩子?”小男孩回答說:“接下來我們跑。”

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